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Opinion By Ted Baldwin
Austin Powers II, The Spy Who Shagged Me

Reviewed: 6/12/99
Watching this film is a whole lot easier than writing about it.
A fictionalized account of time-travel, time-sharing, and The Allen Parsons Project. Timeless.
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FIVE POSSIBLE
When Austin Powers came, you see,
To the end of the Twentieth century
He had his mojo (a groovin' thing)
And all the birds went for a schwing

But Dr. Evil had a scheme
To take the mojo ( By power ream).
So back in time he takes a spin
Stealing Austin's coq-au-vin

As Dr. Evil prissed and primped
Austin's oompa loompa limped.
Imagine Austin Powers-less
While Evil drinks his horniness!

Poor Austin's ego's been deflated
And Willy and The Boys? G-rated.
No grooves for flags at quarter mast
Send Austin packing for the past!

Of course the CIA's involved
Shagwell's almost got it solved
On Evil's side, there's number Two
SOS? No. Oxford Blue.

There's Scott and Frau Farbissina
Mustaffa (We'll be missin' ya)
Mini-Me, A little clone
Your passport to the "same-sex, one-eighth size, perfect replica, non-vocal, son- substitute, self-love, just-the-two-of-us" Twilight Zone

I laughed, I howled, through teary eyes
I watched Scott Evil dad-despise,
And best of all, for the gerbil-bent
was Austin in his back-lit tent.

It's gross. It's crude. It has a feel
like massive mindshag sex appeal.
Remember this, before you go -
One Fat Bastard steals the show!

     Exhaustingly funny, on a par with the best of the Panther films, but infinitely less sophisticated in some ways and immensely more satisfying in others. Mike Meyers has put together one of the most insightful cultural lampoons of the century. Almost every joke is on target, and the ones that are not will be as time passes.
     Even the much over-used Springer Show is fine tuned here to open and close without it once feeling cliched. Unbelievable.
     Seth Green is absolutely wonderful as Scott Evil, pointing out the ludicrousness of the schemes to his unresponsive, clueless dad. The open defiance, impatience, resentment and disgust Scott shows is just breathtaking.
      And bless Rob Lowe, for sacrificing himself for the good of the whole, with a subdued yet hilarious performance. His acting is at least as good as Robert Wagner's. But not more so, which is why I applaud Lowe. Unrecognizable for his resemblance to Wagner, not once did he break character or try to assert his own persona.
     As much as I hated Oxford Blues so many lifetimes ago, I knew then he could act, and prayed that someone would give him a chance to be something other than a face.
     He has been turning in terrific stuff lately, and I hope he is appreciated for his maturity. 		Amusing, isn't it?